Animal Insults: Some of My Best Friends are Dirty Rats

When logic fails us in the heat of an argument, we often attempt to insult our opponents by insinuating that their looks, behavior, or smell is more suited to an animal. But the real insult is to the poor critter.

Number 1: Blind as a Bat
Actually, their vision isn’t all that bad. They are color-blind, as are many humans, but they also have super sharp night vision and can find their way around very well by using echolocation, a form of natural sonar. While in flight, bats emit sounds that bounce off nearby surfaces, and they use those echoes to judge distances.

Number 2: Sweaty as a Pig
When humans get too hot, we sweat. We release perspiration through approximately 2.6 million sweat glands in our skin, and that perspiration evaporates and cools us down. Pigs, however, have no sweat glands and can’t sweat at all, which is why they attempt to lower their body temperature by wallowing in mud.

Number 3: Slimy as a Snake
Although snake scales are shiny and often appear slimy, the reptile’s body is dry to the touch. People may confuse snakes with amphibians such as frogs and salamanders, which have thin skins that are moist to the touch. And worms are definitely slimy.

Number 4; Dirty as a Rat
Even before the Black Plague in the 14th Century, rats had a reputation for being filthy. Due to their lack of an assertive PR department, they haven’t been able to point out that fleas were actually the responsible party. Rats, in fact, are quite clean and tidy. They spend 40% of their time washing themselves (more than the average house cat), searching out water for grooming, and compulsively cleaning and decluttering their habitats.

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